The Fear is Getting Real Now

I have received my license to work in Texas. I have written a new resume and begun to turn in applications. My preceptor from my clinical rides has helped me obtain an interview at her service, and I am starting to feel a pressure that is unlike the pressure and anxiety I experienced going through basic school. If I screwed up in school, I did not get fired. Not only that, I think people expect less from the students. The truth of the matter is: I am not trained any more than I was when I was doing clinicals. Sure, I passed my exams and national registry test, but I have had no more time on the street.

I find myself worrying about patient care, assessment, driving, skills, reputation, attitude, etc. The mistakes I make are real now. I know that I am not expected to be perfect, but I am starting to get nervous and wondering if I can even reach acceptable in a new employers eyes. At a minimum, I don’t wont to hurt anyone any worse than when I found them. My gut tells me yes, I can excel, but I think it is just human to have that voice in the back of my head saying “what if?”

Now I am just reviewing basic material, preparing myself for the next semester, and attempting to be positive. Why is it that when we learn more, we only have more questions, and things become increasingly uncertain? It is totally counter intuitive…